garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
How external is "for external use only"?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
