chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
