i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
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