bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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