It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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