Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
this just has baby written all over it
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
