Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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