we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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