kristin has been a bad kristin
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
