Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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