I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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