i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
