so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize