found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize