i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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