All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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