You really coming over, don't trick.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize