I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
