I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
