Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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