I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
