we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize