Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
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