i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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