he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
