how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
i think i just lost a toe
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
