do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize