i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
They took my balls.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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