they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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