I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize