Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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