i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
