What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
