on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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