I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
This is classic penis vs brain.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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