you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
