"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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