I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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