Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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