on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You dont lie about slip and slides
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
