Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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