The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
