You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Randomize
