I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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