your thong is hanging out like whoa
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
