I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
