Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
