Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
