god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
