Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
this will be a night to untag.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
