Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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