So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Randomize
