What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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